Beginning a New Chapter

This new chapter in our lives has been a lonnnngggg time in the making. John starts full time with the post office on May 3! We're in our 11th year waiting, so our house is jumping for joy!

This means we finally get the benefits that come with his job at the post office, which are pretty darn fabulous, like most government jobs. Exciting stuff! Not to mention the pay raise. Hallelujah!

On a not so exciting note, we had another miscarriage this month. I'm beyond the point where we can beat around the bush about things like this. I'm fine, we're fine - It's just part of the journey.  This was another very early miscarriage, and unfortunately or fortunately these become easier and easier to deal with emotionally. I'm more sad that we didn't even really get excited. There are no celebrations when we get positive pregnancy tests anymore. That part kinda stinks, but I also know that it is God's way of guarding my heart.  I would like your prayers, though. This one has been harder on my body. Very draining and achy physically. I haven't even told anyone but John. I just don't like or want to talk about it. (It's WAY more fun to talk about the cute antics of my TWO year old.)  There's no good way to start this conversation. The benefit of living in this generation is taking early pregnancy tests. The downfall is taking early pregnancy tests. Twenty years ago I would have assumed it was just a two-week late period. Like I said, we're fine. Honestly.  Just needed to get that off my chest.

So if you are keeping track, here's what's happened so far:

BFP #1 - EDD March 4, 2011. MC. DNC August 2010.
BFP #2 - EDD March 4, 2012. Arleigh Olivia was born February 15, 2012.
BFP #3 - EDD January 17, 2014. MC at 7 Weeks.
BFP #4 - EDD December 27, 2014. MC at 6 Weeks.

Back to the fun stuff. I am excited about seeing what is next for our family. We've got our three year plan in motion to save, sell the house and make a decision about private or public school for AO. To my surprise, GORDO public high school has higher 11th grade test scores than any of the public city or county schools in Tuscaloosa. (Yes, I'm the nerd who makes spreadsheets from the data on greatschools.org.)  So the big debate of the moment in the Mansell house - do we relocate to Gordo or stay in Tuscaloosa and do private school?

The other option is moving to Gordo is doing PA, where my first two "nieces" Libby and Millie attend.  Lots of decision making and porch night conversations! Gordo is only a 25 minute drive from my office in Northport, which is quicker than the 40 minutes it takes me to get home in Hillcrest. The traffic on 69 south is HORRID! It would be a longer jaunt for Johnboy (40 minutes compared to his current 7), so we're still weighing all the pros and cons.   John would like AO to start and stay at the same school. I'm fine making changes up to about second grade. I'm a little concerned about the future in Gordo, but currently they seem to be doing a fantastic job. OF COURSE I will keep a check on these until we make a decision, but it's exciting to think that we are almost there!

I really have an old fixer-upper in my head, which is pretty much the only options if we head west. Or we can build, but the fixer-upper charm has my pinterest boards on FIRE.  The fact that we would be 45 minutes closer to my family, right near with John's, and about 15 minutes from my Aunt and Danielle, are HUGE factors in my mind. There is something about small town charm that is appealing.  And room for chickens. Who doesn't love chickens!!!!

It's a big time at the Mansells! Now I'm going back to pinning! :-)

So...We're having another baby...Or not

That got your attention didn't it. 

Well, it got ours, too.

This one is a personal one, so you can stop reading if you don't like girl-talk.

But....If you choose to read it.... Make sure you read it all, k?

Here we go.

We got out BFP (Big Fat Positive) last week and were OOOOooo so excited. We were pregnant! Four (all positive) pregnancy tests later, we were sure and  pumped. Told our parents this past weekend.  Due January 17, my mom's birthday. 23 Months apart. Perfect. Bought AO her very own big sister shirt to wear around the house, so it could sink in with me.  Even had time to teach her to touch my belly and say baby. (So ignore that one if she does it to you.) Close in age will hopefully mean they will be close sisters. Because I just know it's a girl. (Silly, I know.)  I was already dreaming of a girly tweeny craft/music room instead of play room, making potholders and playing with baby dolls instead of playing play station, and hot pink and turquoise. (If we ever have a boy it's going to ROCK my world.)

Lets back up to 2010. Our first positive pregnancy test. It took soooo long the first time. We weren't trying - not like going to the fertility doctor trying. But we most certainly were not using any pregnancy precautions; and I was monitoring all that girly stuff you can monitor on your own to get pregnant. If that makes any sense. Then we lost the baby. And I cried. A lot. John did the "what if" game. A lot. And we grew closer. Our marriage got so much stronger.  Then (EXACTLY a year later TO THE DAY, total God Thing) AO was conceived. And (thank goodness) she had lots of baby magic (GOD) dust and stuck.

 But we never "struggled" with fertility problems. That's a different and much more difficult struggle entirely. We are just one of the millions of (what I consider) normal folks who can't flip the switch and have a baby.   In my crazy, glass-half-full way of thinking, I'm glad I never have to worry with birth control.

Back to the story.

So, last week, I made my doctor's appointments and signed up for blood work.

Then, Tuesday night, the bleeding started. Not to get too personal, but you can bleed pregnant. It's actually quite common. I never did with either of the past two pregnancies. Maybe a little spot, but this wasn't normal. It was worse than a regular cycle. The kind that wakes you up from dead asleep because you can feel it, not normal. (Sorry for the TMI!)

Long story short, we called the doctor, who suggested we come right in to the office. They wanted to do blood work and check the HCG levels.

Trying to get blood.  Not pleasant. 10 DIGGING sticks searching for a vein - even with the butterfly, the old timey syringe, 3 LPNs and 2 Lab Techs later for one itty bitty vial of blood out of the back of my wrist. That tender spot was the last resort, with the hospital lab expert they called in specifically to stick me. I seriously thought they would stick my foot any minute.  (In case you were wondering, I'm sore to match my black and blue today.) I was thanking my Granny again for her tiny, rolling, deep veins I inherited.

Later the same day, we got the dreaded phone call. "Your HCG levels are low. You need to come in tomorrow. It's really to early to make any conclusions, and Dr. E wants to do blood work again tomorrow." Heard that before. Like a 47 HCG at 6 weeks way too low. I knew exactly what this meant.  I keep up with these things. I knew my LMP and the conception date. This kinda bleeding with that number?

Possible miscarriage. Impending miscarriage. Whatever you want to call it.  But in my heart of hearts, I already knew the answer. I know what this means.

All I can say about this time... I thank GOD that this has been a faster process than last time. And that evidently getting pregnant wasn't as hard this time. (That's a bigggg whoopieeee!!! If you have ever struggled, you know what I mean.)  It's just staying pregnant that is the trouble.  And I am SO thankful that my body naturally miscarried (at least we're 90% sure) so that we don't have to go through the horrible waiting and waiting and DNC process. That part...where your brain plays tricks on you and you search online aimlessly for hours even though you know in your gut the truth....it is painful. Ultrasounds, bloodwork, more ultrasounds, misoprostol, then DNC, then more blood work drawn out over weeks so a quick closure is impossible. 

The only thing to do this time - keep getting blood draws until the HCG is zero. That I can handle. 

The God-given peace is SO extremely comforting this time. I don't have false hope. And I am so thankful for the peace.  I know it's better for me physically and emotionally. The first miscarriage was confusing, long, drawn-out and scary. This one - not so much.  I had another close friend go through one recently. And then, there's my bestie Kimberly's story.  Makes my little bitty suffering so much simpler.  And thinking about her pain makes mine hurt so much less. I truly don't know that kind of hurt and pain.  I have a child. I don't have a reason to make myself suffer this time. I am truly ok.

 Most people don't like talking about these type things. And I get it. It's personal. So very personal. But for whatever reason, it makes it easier for me to put it all out there. Plus, by putting it out there you get all the folks who tell you it happened to them. Which believe me, is a lot of people. When I think of my close circle, 75% have had a pregnancy loss of some kind. Blighted ovum, ectopic, molar. It happens, and it is extremely common. Maybe my thought is that by talking about loss, we up the chances that some girl out there will hear about it BEFORE it happens to her for the first time. Because that first time is the worst. So she's not so shocked and can handle it better. So she knows it is absolutely normal. Maybe, just maybe.

Or maybe it's more selfish. Maybe then we won't get the "so when are you having another?" questions, which I DREAD. If you aren't in my innermost circle, you don't get to ask that question. I hated it before Arleigh, too. I always want so bad to say (for 6 years before AO) "When God wants a baby to stick and grow in my uterus, you numb-skull."  (Not the most Christian like response, I realize.)  What do people think, anyway? What do you expect the answer to be? You want me to pull out my iphone tracker so you can see my ovulation cycle? (Sorry, I can be a little much at times.) If you are in the circle, you know all of this anyway.  So if you have friends going through this, for goodness sake be delicate on how you approach this situation.

I'm headed to go cuddle my precious (and ohhh so sweet) Arleigh right now. It's like she's extra cuddly just for me. :-)  My heart is definitely full with her. But there also seems to be a piece of our family that is missing. It's hard to explain. I'm just still torn on how the other piece of the family will fit. If you know us, you know I am oh-so-pro adoption. We have very precious members of our family and church who have adopted domestically and internationally - some because of fertility issues and some because they had that calling. But John has this idea that his kids are all biological. In my heart I know God will change his heart if it needs changing. Only God knows our game plan.  Maybe we'll be pregnant again in no time. Maybe God will make my family complete as it is in my heart. I'm not going to stress about it. That's all in God's plan. Just gotta trust it. 

The peace you feel when you just let go. That peace, the sweet relief that only comes from Him...I'm enjoying it. And I refuse to let this little bump in the road take my joy. I'm going to use it to draw closer. This life is way to short to spend it miserable.  So now you know. I really am okay with all this. 

Later Gators.  I'll leave you with this. Another Jesus Calling. Don't you just love it? There is something so comforting about Jesus talking directly with you. And I love this one. It's especially true right now. This one hits home. It's so hard to have this kind of trust and faith, isn't it? Trying to tell the human brain to not worry? But He loves us THAT much.

I, the Creator of the universe, am with you and for you. What more could you need? When you feel some lack, it is because you are not connecting with Me at a deep level. I offer abundant Life; your part is to trust Me, refusing to worry about anything.

It is not so much adverse events that make you anxious as it is your thoughts about those events. Your mind engages in efforts to take control of a situation, to bring about the result you desire. Your thoughts close in on the problem like ravenous wolves. Determined to make things go your way, you forget that I am in charge of your life. The only remedy is to switch your focus from the problem to My Presence. Stop all your striving, and watch to see what I will do. I am the Lord!

What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?
—Romans 8:31–32

But as for me, I watch in hope for the Lord, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.
—Micah 7:7


Happy Memorial Day weekend to you and yours.

Gerber Babies

This is superficial and silly, but when I was pregnant and folks would ask me what I wanted, I'd say a gerber baby. I think I got my wish. :-) every parent thinks their baby is the most beautiful ever, so we can just call this the bragging that it is. John and I made one pretty baby. (or at least we think so!)I'll have to update soon on our past 10 days battling salmonella. An adventure in parenting.  I'm so thankful our precious baby is back to smiling. No real giggles in over a week, but hopefully soon! She definitely feels much better.

Top 10 things I didn't know before Arleigh

10.  Nasty, smelly poop can excite you. Especially when your baby is crying and fussy and you know she just needs to let it out. There has been once already where we were so excited and happy there could have been balloons, cake, and ice cream afterwards.  Speaking of belly issues, babies have gas. And bad gas can have grown up smells. We are in amazement sometimes that 12 pounds of cuteness can clear a room.

9. Babies cry and get fussy when you try to eat supper. Arleigh is the best diet invention yet. Apparently when I come home from work I'm all hers. It means we rarely cook supper anymore, too. I like that arrangement, but I have to eat sometimes. Lots of meals of triscuits and hummus so far. Apparently Arleigh's "I want my mama and my mama wants me" diet plan is working. I'm down 14 pounds in the past three weeks. (Way to go Arleigh!) It also means that my lean cuisines at work for lunch are extremely enjoyable. It could just be the uninterrupted part of the deal.

8.  They make zip up footed PJs without the engineering degree snaps. I LOVE zippers! Especially at 2 in the morning half asleep with no contacts.

7.  Cheaper luvs diapers can hold more pee at night and don't leave a damp feeling on her clothes like pampers and huggies. This was news to me....I thought you paid more for better. Apparently not. But I do really like the new stripes on diapers that turn dark green when she's wet. That is way cool.

6. I didn't know I would totally revert back to child hood. This includes reading silly books in multiple voices (We LOVE Going on a Bear Hunt), singing silly songs and having conversations with just ahhh and goo. Conversations with an 11 week old are just about the highlight of my day.

5.  One smile can make you melt. JUST MELT. I'm going to have to teach myself and her daddy that just because she has that sweet smile doesn't mean she can have anything. If she could talk right now, it would be dangerous. "Diamonds, please Daddy?" "Paris for Christmas, Mama?"  "I'd like to go to the moon, Papa." Why sure, honey. Whatever you want.

4.  Buying used clothes was so cool. I've never been a consignment, eBay, or Facebook used clothes shopper. But it means so many more outfits when you will wear something for 3-4 months. Most of Arleigh's smocked dresses (that weren't gifts or hand me downs) I bought for $15 and less. I'm a new fan!

3. I didn't know we would check milestone charts everyday and text out our updates. And that we'd be watching so closely for the next little thing.  (The poor next kid. I'm afraid they won't get such luxuries.)  I'm such a goober, because I really do know that this doesn't mean jack when it comes to walking or other development. But I like to know we're progressing.  This week she loves to stand and put all her weight on her legs. (So stubbornly so, she's started locking them straight so you have to stand her up.) She's started a giggle that is pretty darn adorable. She loves sitting in her bumpo seat or sitting straight up in your lap checking out the world from a new angle. She's able to hold her head up and turn it side to side on her own pretty good now.  She's really discovered the TV and would probably like us to let her watch it more. (She likes Seinfeld like her Daddy for some reason. Mommy doesn't.) And she's starting to love her fingers more and more, which Mommy likes because it means she can suck on her fingers instead of using Mommy, the world's best midnight to dawn fussy baby paci-putter-back-inner.

2.  How AWESOME John would be at this. (I figured I'd catch on pretty quick. I love babies and kids. I worked in a daycare. I've had babies around me forever.) Call me crazy, but I just assumed since he'd never wanted to be around babies or kids that he wouldn't be into parenting.  (I now know wanting to be around kids and having your own are two entirely different things.)  Heck, He's held Swayze once, and other than his conversations with Millie and Libby over the years, that's about the extent of his child care expertise. BOY WAS I WRONG. I'll never forget them rolling her in to the room at the hospital Friday night. (We had her Wednesday, and after much begging, they moved her from NICU to Well Baby so she could come to the room.) John just reached in and picked her up like he'd done it a thousand times. He gave me a little look like "here we go" and he just went for it. He hasn't stopped. He changes most poopies, feeds, bathes, sings...all of it. He's making me SO proud. So very, very, proud. Arleigh is very lucky to have a daddy like him.

1. And my number one thing that I didn't know before Arleigh...How you can have THIS MUCH LOVE for something so little and tiny. I knew we would love her. But I can't even explain the volume of love for her. It amazes me EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

Mommy Life - All I can say is WOW!

This is a long one...excuse my babbling.

It's an amazing process. You get pregnant, and (if you are lucky) Poof! You have a baby and become a mom. Just like that. There's no magic switch to create this amazing love....but let me tell you, something happens and the flood gates open. And love grows. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.  I'm so amazed that I can wake up in the morning, see those smiley blue eyes and sweet chubby cheeks staring at me jabbering and just have the surreal rush of love. It's AMAZING. Absolutely God sent. In the beginning it was about survival. Feed, sleep, poop and repeat, all on zero sleep for the parents.  There wasn't much time to think about what you were doing. But now - we're almost 10 weeks -  the bubbly little personality begins to shine and the love keeps on growing. Maybe it's because of the miscarriage and the fact we wanted her SO much. I don't know where it comes from. I just know it's some kind of amazing love.

If you can't tell, we think Arleigh O is FABULOUS. She's a grinner and a talker. She loves to be the center of whatever is going on. From about 3 weeks, if you left her while she was wide awake she'd let you know that wasn't the plan she had in mind. She doesn't have to be held, but she has to know you are there...talking, listening to her babble and coo. If we're cooking or working on chores, she likes to be right there with you. (I hope she's like that until she's 30, but somehow I know it won't last.)

I'm one of those Mama's that can't really sing - but we sing ALL the time. (I'll blame that on the W....we had songs for EVERYTHING!) Old hymns, Praise and Worship, Masker and Silhouette songs, kid's songs, made up songs (thanks Uncle Richard) ....We sing. We start each day with Rise and Shine and give God the Glory....our own version.  (I hope I'm that mom who will stay goofy and will sing this when she's home from college one day.) And we carry on the silliest conversations. There is nothing sweeter than Arleigh answering my grown kid questions with her AhAhs and GoooGoos....It's my little piece of heaven. (Arleigh apparently talked Poppy in to a new boat and a chicken coop Sunday morning while Mommy and NanO were getting ready for church. She was a chatterbox talking to him!) She's finding her voice more and more. Some sounds are just crazy, like when she figured out how to make the silly hiccup sound without actually having the hiccups last Saturday morning. Our favorite game is mimicking sounds. Ah Ah Ah by Mommy then AhAhAh by Arleigh. LOVE it! :-)

Her favorite current possession would have to be her mobile in her crib. She loves that sucker. And Clarence of course. She likes to talk to both. Don't know what she's saying, but they all seem to be happy.

She's letting me read now more and more. I started in the beginning, but she wasn't that interested and would be crying by page 4. (Mommy was so into reading it may have been a bit overwhelming.) From about week 6, she started really focusing on the pages and can now stay engaged for 2 books or more - depending on how much ad-lib Mommy ads. I love the silliness and simplicity of children's books, and apparently I've been missing them for years...Because I can read at night as long as she'll let me. :-) 

We tried rice cereal mixed with formula by spoon around 7 weeks and also in a cereal feeder. She LOVED it and wanted to chow it down! She would attack the spoon with a vengeance! But it didn't make a difference on her staying to sleep longer at all, and didn't really help with reflux, but it did make her break out in a little rash. (Of course my child would be the one allergic to rice.) We decided we'd shelf the idea until closer to 4 months and try again. She's up to sleeping now from 10-3 on her own. The doctor said it had more to do with her size and weight, and if she's getting everything she needs to eat during the day. He said most babies are sleeping through the night on their own (without cereal) at 3-4 months.

Speaking of eating, she's up to around 30 ounces a day. (New mamas, you calculate the minimum they can eat by taking their weight times 2.5, and that's the ounces per day.) She's on a pretty decent schedule. She takes the bulk of her bottles (6 oz) from noon to about 10 at night, then "snack" eats 2-4 ozs randomly in between. 

I've been overwhelmed lately by the seriousness of the responsibility we have to raise our kids right. I'm still figuring out what kind of mom I want to be, what type of discipline we'll want to use, how we'll keep our kids engaged in our family - the list goes on. Heck, she's 10 weeks old.  My mom and I had the conversation this weekend about child rearing. (I have pretty amazing parents. So does John.) I've always known the train up a child verse, but it's never really meant anything to me. Until now.

Proverbs 22:6

Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

We raise them right. We give them all the knowledge and directions they need to get to the destination. Of course we hope the road is straight and smooth. But they are going to hit pot holes, they are going to get lost. But if we give them the know-how to figure out how to get back on the right road, they will get to the destination in the end. We have to make their foundation solid so that when we let them go, which we will eventually have to do, they can find the right way on their own. That's the goal. Not for us to drive them there or be the co-pilot for life. But for us to give them the tools to get there on their own. In the end, we have to let go and let God.

 I already know I'm the mom who'd rather have dirty clothes and eat a lean cuisine for supper than miss out on my daily conversation with Arleigh during her awake time when I'm home from work.

I'm the mom that loves to listen and gather everyone's opinions to get ideas (like with the cereal) then go with what works best for us, sometimes throwing it all out the window. There's not a book or person out there that has my baby. And we will always know what's best. Even if we have to search the depths of our soul for the answer and live with the consequences of our mistakes. We're her parents. It's our job. 

I'm the mom that likes being silly and cheesy because now I have the perfect excuse. (Not that I really needed one, but I love goofy. Especially baby goofy when no one else is around.)

I'm the mom that didn't freak when breast feeding didn't work for us. I had kinda figured on a csection, and wasn't totally distraught by the fact of not having a natural delivery. I just wanted her here. But the one thing I did really want to do was breast feed. I have horrible allergies, and I knew BF was best. Plus, the bonding with your baby would have been such a wonderful experience. Both of us tried hard for 6 weeks. Really hard.  If I hadn't gone back to work I'd still be trying. But even with pumping round the clock, Arleigh trying, lactation consultants calls and visits, reading books and websites, bottles of fenugreek, friends helping...It didn't work for us. The most we ever got was 2-3 ounces a day. When you have a kid that was eating 25 ounces a day, completely frustrated with anything other than a bottle, and you are going back to work, it didn't make sense for us to continue. We calculated that I was spending 5-6 hours a day pumping and washing parts. (Outside of her feedings, because she didn't want anything to do with the breast. And with the super duper hospital grade pump, I couldn't do anything else while pumping.) Even though I know the little bit we did give her was best. (And she loved it!) I wish it would have been great for us and I'll try again next time. But I'm not going to let it define who I am as a mom. We did what was best for us and Arleigh, and that's what matters. There are plenty of other ways to bond. I know that now.

I'm the mom who learned real quick to throw out the judgement of other moms and their parenting.  I'm eating lots of my words and thoughts, just like my daddy-in-law said I would. I'm sure I'll be eating all of them before we hit 18. Everyone has different ideas, just like every kid will need the parents to understand they are different, and individuals. What works for one won't work for another. Discipline will be different. Schedules will be different. Even morals will be different from family to family. You just have to trust your instincts and roll with it...and there may be consequences. But you're doing your best, right? 

I'm the mom that knows she may be a dream baby right now, but there's going to come a time when she's not going to be this perfect. I'm soaking up the good now, but I know we're going to have bumps soon. And I just hope we as parents stay focused on the outcome of her character. But lets be real, I can hope and pray all day about how I want her to be. But she's going to be herself, and I just hope we give her enough tools to turn out top-notch in the end. 

I'm the laid back mom who doesn't freak when dog-brother Clarence decides his newborn sister needs a kiss...or kisses. As a matter of fact, Clarence has become the perfect baby sitter...you just have to let him. If she's crying, you can tell "brother" to check on "sister", and he'll go stick his nose in her face and let out some sort of gruff in their own language. Typically she will automatically chill out and just look at her goofy, big, black, fur ball brother. Some days, Clarence gets all the smiles. The vet actually told us that this was the best thing we could do for Clarence and his relationship within the family. Let him do what comes natural from the beginning and just be there to make sure he won't hurt or show aggression. And he hasn't. He's a great big brother. Clarence was in the family first, and we try hard for him to know he's still a part, even though his role (and amount of attention) has definitely changed.

I'm the mom who makes it a habit now to apologize to her when I get tired and cranky and don't act like a mom should. (Sometimes, even with my happy self, it happens from sheer exhaustion.) She doesn't have a clue now.  But one day, if it's a habit of mine, hopefully she will be able to do the same.We want her to have grace. The kind of grace that knows no one is perfect. Even parents.

I'm the mom who knows Arleigh should be in bed earlier than 10 or 11 on a better schedule because she needs 10-11 hours of sleep, but I can't do it because I want to spend every minute I'm awake with her. She's usually awake from about 4-11 pm - just for her Mama I'm sure. She can sleep at school. (For now anyway.)

 I'm the mom who prays with her every day because I want her to know it's part of our routine. Even if she still doesn't have a clue what I'm doing. One day she will. One day it will be her habit.

I'm the mom that bites my tongue if someone is doing something different with her than how I would do it. Or advice that doesn't matter. Just keep on smiling and change the subject. None of us have broken her yet.

I'm the mom that said for years I could never be a stay at home mom, but now I'm eating my words and would do anything to be afforded the luxury of taking care of Arleigh full time. (But I hope she grows to respect me for working hard in a different way.) I'm sure she will be fine; it's more upsetting for me than her. She has fantastic teachers who smother her with love during the day.  And when she's older, they will provide a great education. Of course I'll still need to supplement it all. She, just like me, will be fine. Although the more personality she gets, the harder it is to leave her every day. Makes me wanna cry! Or we could blame it on the new hormones...Who knows. Either way, it's HARD! Thank goodness for sweet teachers who text me pictures!

I'm the mom that wants to spoil her with love, my time, attention and affection, but not spoil her with things. I hope this is one we can remember to stick to as she gets older. (Current closet excluded from judgement.)  :-)

I'm the mom that doesn't panic when daddy puts Palmolive in the bathtub instead of baby wash. I'm just thankful she has a dad that wants to give her a bath. She's loved. So very loved.

Arleigh's baby dedication was Sunday. We went "home" to Mt. Zion to have her dedicated over to the Lord. :-) Full circle for me. NanO did the dedication, and Bro. Steve did the prayer. It was where I was born, brought up, saved, baptized, married, and now Arleigh's dedication. Arleigh had a cheering section. When you think about it, this was a huge day in her life. We, as parents, have made the decision that she's really not ours. She's God's, just on loan. We're responsible for making sure when she meets God, He's proud of his child. (See...SERIOUS responsibility!)  Papa and JuJu, Nano and Poppy, Uncle Josh, Aunt Brittney, Cousin Swayze, Cousins DanDan, Libby Lou and Millie Claire, Cousin Alexa, Auntie Rosie, and Tuscaloosa Aunties Beth and Claire came to see her dedication. (Total cheering section!) Arleigh is surrounded by a village of love.

When all this love comes pouring out of you for this one little baby, there's plenty to go around elsewhere, believe it or not. It's amazing what this new little love has done for our marriage. She's changed us both already. We smile more. Laugh more. Love more. Have you seen John as a daddy? He's down-right awesome. He loves his little mini-me, and she loves him. As a matter of fact, when she first did the "follow the voice" and "follow the face" it wasn't for her Mama - It was for her Daddy.  They are buds. :-) Arleigh only stays at school for about 3 hours in the morning now. John picks her up and he has Daddy duty until I get home. He's great with her. Gets up at night, changes diapers, gives baths...whatever needs doing he's right there. So protective. Super hero mode already.  I pity the guy who comes knocking on our door one day.   Maybe it's because she's 80% John, 15% Josh and about 5% me. Sometimes I can look at her and John's percentage goes down to 60%, but he's winning the genetics right now.

The best advice and the most repeated advice has been to hold them, love them, and hold them some more. Friends who have little ones to elderly adults have all stressed to us that she's going to grow so fast, that when she is on the move she may not want you to hold her. I'm definitely soaking up the sweet baby while I can.  We're making it a point to chill out and enjoy her.

Thank you notes and baby announcements, I promise I have you printed and on the to-do list! House cleaning and cooking, you can wait, too! I've still not reopened Daisymaes. I'm just not ready yet. Arleigh's the one that gets to be center of our universe right now.  It's hard enough going back to my 40 hour a week job - that wasn't a choice. But Daisymaes I can choose. Right now it's not as important...  I've been creative for others for so long, now it's time to use that little gift for Arleigh.   I've been very blessed and fortunate to have a creative outlet and make a little extra. But we're readjusting our needs as a family now, and choosing a second job to take another 8-15 hours a week away just isn't an option. Not while SHE needs me to be a mama.

Gosh she's cute. :-)

But Of COURSE it's hard! We have a 10 week old and our batteries are running out of juice most days! We try to stick to a schedule, but she has a mind of her own sometimes.  I just cut us all some slack, give a little grace and keep on trucking. We are new to this after all. She doesn't seem to mind or even know if we mess up, she just knows we're always there. She knows she's content and loved. She's one of those easy babies. (Even though we're not sleeping, and our new routine/schedule was shot after our weekend in Columbus.) She's still a very good, calm baby.

Man I love my little ray of sunshine and my little family.  When I say we are truly blessed, we REALLY are blessed. Life is good. So sweet and so good.

Now if I can just remember all this when she hits the terrible twos through teenage years, we'll be in business. That's why it takes a village, right? So the village can pick up when we mess up....or we're wore slap out! :-)

I have a hubs who brings me homemade milkshakes. :-) we had a talk that I thought preggo needed a little ice cream pick me up, and knowing that his are MUCH better than any drive thru, I got a special, made with love shake as my last food as a surprise. Ain't that sweet? :-)

To all my mommy to be friends. Pack your bags and your car well in advance of your due date! Last Thursday we went in for a regular checkup at 36w2days by their calculations. Ended up downstairs in the hospital, where we'll stay until we get a baby. I missed one fabulous shower by my neighbor Beth today, and then these lovelies are setting up the nursery and packing bags for me and Arleigh....